Failures Are Your Internal GPS Recalculating Your Direction
When I was a kid, Legally Blonde was the first PG-13 movie that I ever watched. It came out in 2001, which means that I was either in 1st or 2nd grade, & I remember sitting in my grandparents office and watching it with my cousin. I fell in love with the character of Elle Woods and instantly decided that I was going to be a lawyer. My best friend & I, who's father is a lawyer, dreamed up the master plan of one day opening our own firm and living out our very own Legally Blonde reality.
I kept with this dream for a long time. All through elementary school and high school, I wanted nothing more than to be a lawyer (my best friend changed her mind and decided she was going to be a Doctor instead...which she is pursuing now). I even recited Elle Wood's application video in my senior year English class for a poetry contest...you could say that I was dedicated to the dream.
When I went on my college visit to West Virginia University with my mom for first time, I sat down with on of the academic advisers in the Ag school. When he asked me what my end goal of being a part of the Davis School of Agriculture was, I told him just that...I wanted to be a lawyer. I had this glamorous vision in my head of getting my Bachelor's of Science, and then going on the Law School so that I could have my own firm in Salem County to help the local farmers that didn't have financial resources for expensive lawyers to fight their battles. Seriously, I had it all planned out. Down to the interior design of my office, I had dreamed it all up. Even had a Pinterest board.
If you have read my previous blog posts, you will know that I had a lot of life altering experiences while away at college. & while most would look at them as 'sad' or 'heart breaking,' I never looked at them that way. I looked at them as a chance to change my life. About half way through my Junior/Senior year of college, and taking every environmental law course that I could as an undergraduate and studying all summer break long, I decided that I wasn't going to take my LSAT. I still remember the look on my Dad's face when I told him...I wasn't going to law school. I wasn't even going to try.
Now, if you are reading this you are probably thinking "Wow, this girl completely gave up on her life long dream." But, here is the thing...it wasn't my dream anymore. My path was altered. & while I can't say that it was God who changed my path (because it was certainly the Devil), it was God that lead me down a new one & it was God that taught me that changing my path was okay. I was so disappointed in myself because I felt like I had let people down. That I wasn't living up to my full potential. That I was a failure.
Looking back on it over 3 years later, I have realized that it wasn't a failure...it was a redirect into something so much better. We let the world 'fail' weigh so heavy on our hearts.
Read the definition, "to fall short of success or achievement in something expected, attempted, desired, or approved."
There is no positive piece of this definition when we read it in the dictionary. However, I have learned that failure is a gift. It is not a reflection of my skills or who I am. Instead, it is a redirection to the place that we are supposed to be. It is your internal GPS recalculating the directions.
If someone were to tell me just 3 years ago that I would be a business owner, let alone in the fashion industry, I would literally laugh in their face. "Are you kidding me? I wear jeans, boots, and a hoodie every day of my life and I can't even begin to tell you when the last time I wore makeup was." That would be my response. But look at where I am now? I am not a lawyer. I am not Elle Woods. I am not a failure. I am Abigail Morrissey. & I think that is worth so much more.
Why am I telling you this? Why am I telling you that I failed? It is never too late to change or alter your path. Though nobody can go back and start a new beginning, anyone can start today to create a new ending. Our existence happens over seconds, minutes, days, and years. Don't let that time go to waste.